When I was a young man, my mother once gave me some advice for how to meet girls. She was in the middle of one of her “I was young once too, you know” speeches when she suddenly asked me if I would like some tips for getting the young ladies to give me a chance. I was striking out pretty regularly with the ladies at that point, so although it felt a little odd to be discussing this with my mom I paid attention to what she had to say.
She told me the best thing to do was to go right out to the dance floor and ask a girl to dance. Don’t get discouraged if the first couple of times you get rejected, she cautioned, and never take it personally. Just thank that girl and go ask the next girl to dance. Once a girl says yes, get out on the dance floor and dance until she wants to quit. By the night’s end, my mom said confidently, you will have girls lining up to dance with you.
I tried her strategy at the next dance and it worked perfectly. I had a blast and met a lot of young ladies. I have used this “first on the dance floor, last off” philosophy for years and it has continued to deliver good results – even outside of the dance floor (more on that later.)
Several years later I reminded her of this advice and asked her how she had known it would work. She replied that, having been a young lady once too, you know, she knew that young ladies like to dance and they like to be asked to dance. In fact, she told me, that was how she had met my dad. He came right up to her at a USO Halloween dance and asked her to dance with him. That led to 52 years of marriage and 5 kids, none of which would have been possible if he hadn’t had the courage to ask her to dance the first time.
Why do you suppose we often don’t take the chance and dance? It is usually our fear of rejection or of what other people will think of us. We get stuck in our own comfort zones. Every time I start to fall into that mentality I remind myself that we are only here for a short while, so get outside of that comfort zone and have some fun with your life!
The same approach can work in business. As Michael Jordan once said, “You always miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” You’ll never make that deal if you don’t put yourself out there in the industry first. Go to a function and challenge yourself to operate the whole time out of your comfort zone. Walk up to potential clients, introduce yourself and start a conversation. Don’t let your fear of possible rejection rule you – rule it.
Have a great weekend,
Ro