It’s funny how in life the people we remember most are the ones who were there for us at our lowest points. When we are on top – getting a promotion or buying an expensive new car – everyone wants to be around us. People we haven’t talked to in years call us up to tell us how great we are, and companies compete for our business. But when the situation changes and times get tough, that phone has a tendency to stop ringing.
Fortunately there are always a few loyal folks who stick around and continue to encourage us through the tough times. I have immense respect and admiration for those people, especially when they take a public stance of support.
This is the one of the reasons I love watching the sidelines during a sporting event. Everyone in the stadium celebrates when someone on their team makes a great play. But what happens when someone makes an awful play? While the fans may boo in disgust, the player’s teammates often make an extra effort to come over and encourage them as they come back to the sideline. A pat on the back, a few encouraging words – they seem like small gestures, but they demonstrate both support and respect among the team and can have a big impact on the players’ morale.
A personal example of this comes from when my sister Sally played basketball in elementary school. During a game she made a great steal and drove the length of the floor, finishing with what she thought was the game-winning basket. It was the winning basket all right – but for the other team. She had scored in the opposing team’s hoop.
She sat down in the middle of the floor as the other team celebrated, distraught over what she had done. My dad went right over to her from his place in the bleachers. My dad, a well-known local football coach who had been a standout athlete himself, could have been embarrassed by her mistake and lectured her. Instead, he told her not to worry and complimented her on what a great, athletic play she had made. Just those few calming words from her dad made things all right, and she still remembers them to this day.
One way or another, people remember how you treated them in their worst moments far more than how you treated them in their best ones. How you respond in those situations has the potential to shape your relationship with the person far into the future.
The list of people who were there for someone when they were down is usually pretty short. If you want solid relationships in your business and personal life, make sure you’re on it.
Have a great weekend,
Ro