Ever notice that when we are beaten at something the first thing we do is make excuses for how it could possibly have occurred? We go to great lengths to rationalize why we lost. My favorite is the behind-the-scenes look. In my business, that can look something like this: “The only reason we lost that pitch is because the CEO’s daughter went to high school with the junior broker on X company’s team.”
Another standby is that they didn’t choose us because our company is too small or too large. Or that they don’t like us because we do business with their competitors. What about the old “we needed more time?” Well, who’s fault was that?
The list goes one and on. Sometimes it even gets personal – and, if we’re honest, a little silly: “They resented us because we’re the best. They wanted to give somebody else a chance because we get all the business in this market.” These excuses may make us feel better after the fact, but if we keep making them we’re all but guaranteeing that the same result – namely, losing the business – will happen again.
If you take away the excuses after a loss, what do you have left? A little disappointment, maybe some bitterness, but ultimately accountability. Only when we remove the excuses can we get to the root of the problem by recognizing where we went wrong and determining what changes we can make for the next attempt.
So what does it look like to let go of excuses and embrace accountability? The first thing I would suggest is to look at who or what else you are blaming for your failure. My dad used to say, “Don’t criticize; analyze.” I’ve written about that before. What is it that the winning group did better than you which might have contributed to their success? Even if the answer is, “They recruited someone who was friends with the CEO’s daughter,” it’s still a point you can analyze. Is there any way for you to replicate that in future deals? Maybe you need to work on your networking, or try to leverage existing relationships into deals.
Next, I would recommend reflecting on prior setbacks. I know this might be painful, but it is important. Are there any patterns? If you are completely honest with yourself, can you identify areas where you are consistently under-performing? If so, make those areas your next target for improvement.
An outside perspective is often helpful when we’re trying to see around our own blind spots. If you have a mentor in your industry, or even a trusted co-worker or friend, ask them to sit down with you and give an honest assessment of where they think you could improve.
The sooner you quit making excuses and start facing the truth, the sooner you will be able to make the changes that lead you to victory in the next round.
Have a great weekend,
Ro