Many years ago when I was just starting out in business I was passed over for a promotion I thought that I deserved. I met with a mentor in the industry and went on and on to him about how hard I had worked and how much more qualified I was than the person who had gotten the job. The more I talked the more I felt the pain of falling short when I had so clearly deserved to win. I asked my mentor what he thought, assuming he would agree with me. His response stunned me: “‘Deserve’ has nothing to do with it.”
I asked him to explain this to me, and he gave me another line, this one from legendary Microsoft founder Bill Gates during a commencement speech: “Life’s not fair.” It was high time I realized this, he said, and stopped setting myself up for disappointment by expecting something different. This is a tough business, and nobody is going to hand you what you think you deserve. You have to go out there and earn it, over and over again.
I had a deal recently that reminded me of this tough lesson. I did everything right on this one. I added tremendous value for my client by getting a great price for their property, and I shepherded the deal through a long, drawn-out negotiation that took nearly 2 years. We had a signed contract, and we went to close the deal – and the buyer decided to walk away, even though it meant they would have to walk from their security deposit. I can honestly say that in my 30 years in this business I have never seen a deal blow up this close to the finish line. But this one did, and there wasn’t a darn thing I could do about it.
Sales is a uniquely brutal business because sometimes you end up doing a ton of work and walk away with nothing to show for it. It’s easy (and, to some extent, fair) to think that you deserve something for your efforts, but that isn’t how the game is played in this industry. If you spend too much time focusing on what you deserved but didn’t get, you will lose sight of other opportunities. As hard as it is, you have to pick yourself up, go out and earn that business over again.
I’m not saying that you shouldn’t fight to be paid a fair commission, or that you should roll over and let other people walk all over you. Just don’t get a chip on your shoulder, and don’t get bitter. Deserve has nothing to do with it, and life (and business) are not fair. Accept this, rise up and fight the good fight again tomorrow.
Have a great weekend,
Ro